kids fighting

It starts out as a low whine and by increments it steadily progresses to a high-pitched shriek “I’m Gona tell GRANDMA!”

Next I hear feet running across the floor as the siren shrieks to search out where grandma is hiding!

“Grandma, Lee, he, put his butt in my face! He told me he was going to fart in my face!

Lee, yells from his bedroom, “I did not! You, you’re just trying to get me in trouble JOSIE!”

Am not
Are too
Am not
Are too

Jesus, Mary, Joseph, what special misery awaits me today?

I am not even out of bed yet!

There is nothing like waking up in the morning to kids circling my bed screaming over the top of me wanting me to intervene to punish one of the offenders so the other can privately gloat which sets off another string of complaints against the other.

I clamp my pillow over my head to try to muffle out the rivalry between the two beloved children but their thirst for justice will not be abated.

I debate if I should keep my head buried under the pillow until they leave but upon peeking out from under the pillow I see very determined eye balls looking at me so that is not really an option.

Hmm, which one do I throw to the curb so that temporary peace will be restored? Both are guilty of breaking the sound barrier! The assault on my ears should be a felony!

This situation calls for the standard response. It starts out as a low whine and by increments it steadily progresses to a high-pitched shriek “If you can’t get along SEPARATE NOW!”

I am seriously thinking about installing loud speakers in the house that will play the same recording every time a fight breaks…a very loud, annoying sound like fingernails slowly racking across a chalkboard!

Slightly Frazzled,

Donna Faye, CDP

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